Hey “Man”…
Testosterone is a wonderful thing, don’t you think? Flexing our “guyness” is something we need to do from time to time as we go through the daily grind of working, taxes, and paying bills. Camaraderie amongst other members of the male species and grunting like the apes that we are is a crucial part in the preservation of our collective psyche. Okay, thankfully we’re not gonna fling our crap at one another – I mean, evolution has brought us to a slightly higher standard – but we will congregate and do all the stereotypical things that men do when brought together in a most manly environment.
So here we go…
Take hundreds and hundreds of manly men and put them around huge barbecue pits – burgers, dogs, sausage and chicken searing over the hot coals as the air is filled with the smoke of charring animal flesh. Now tell the guys that they can have all the icy cold beer that they can wash down their eager gullets. Then give them a bag completely chock full of premium hand rolled cigars and let them know they can smoke in public to their hearts delight. Maybe bring in a couple of spectacular Playboy playmates to fraternize with for several hours. Oh yeah, motorcycles – toss a bunch of custom hogs into the mix because a man needs to be surrounded by outrageously crafted machines. Now tell the guys that they can gamble… let’s see, how about horse racing? Yeah, that’s cool right?
So let me get this all straight…
We gather several hundred guys, feed them barbecued meat, give them ample amounts of golden nectar, load them up with fine cigars, toss in a couple of centerfold gals & custom bikes, then let these boys roam the grounds like crazed primates, throwing their money down on highly trained athletic equines. Sounds like the ultimate fantasy that every upright walking male creature would kill to be a part of, right? Well, there’s no need to whack anybody to experience this kind of hedonistic day of decadence, all you needed to do was attend Meadowlands Madness that took place this past Friday night in northern New Jersey.
Don’t you remember a few weeks ago I wrote about this amazing upcoming event and I said that I don’t care where you live, it would be worth the trip to partake in the festivities? Well I was right, and if you didn’t show, well all I can say is that there’s always next year. I could also say that you blew it big time, but don’t worry bro, I won’t rub that in your face.
You know, I’ve been associated with the good peeps at JR Cigars for quite a while now and the one thing that’s for sure is that everything they do is centered on giving the customer the best smoking experience possible. And I can tell you that without a shadow of a doubt, the Meadowlands Madness event was as fun and awesome as any cigar shindig you’ll ever attend. Everyone was in a great mood, stuffing their faces, guzzling their favorite swill, and toking the hand rolled beauties that came in everyone’s $230 value goodie bag. Can it possibly get any better? Yeah it can.
I was asked by the JR staff to pose in the winner’s circle photo after the fifth race and award the winner a trophy. So I’m standing at the finish line and here comes my two horses, one and two for the exacta paying $100! Wahoo baby! So as I’m posing with the driver and the owner, the PA announcer says, “And awarding the trophy to the winner is the Zman from JR Cigars!” Then I look at the tote board and the it says ZMAN in gigantic letters! What a friggin pisser. Thanks a ton to my good buddy, Steve Nathan! You rock, my brother.
So if you didn’t get to attend, well, hopefully we’ll do another and you’ll wise up and get your lame-ass carcass to the Meadowlands Racetrack in East Rutherford, New Jersey. Until then, this is the your gluttonous and hedonistic purveyor of manly goodness, signing off.
Tommy Z.
JR Cigars Blog with the Zman
June 27th, 2010 at 8:49 pm
Great post, Zman. That had to be one awesome
experience being there in the winner’s circle,
awarding the winner a trophy. And to watch your
two horses coming across the finish line, paying
a handsome price, wow! Then to see your name
in gigantic letters on the tote board. It doesn’t
get much better than that.
And now for your next feat?
June 27th, 2010 at 10:22 pm
Didn’t you have to give up the first day of vacation to attend this little shin-dig? Is that why it was posted a day early?
I would have loved to have been there, but it simply couldn’t happen this year.
Maybe (?) next year.
June 27th, 2010 at 10:37 pm
Zman, when the winning horse saw your ugly mug waiting for him in the Winners Circle, did he suddenly wish that he had come in second? LMAO!!!!
June 27th, 2010 at 10:38 pm
And get a load of Mister Vanderbilt, who’s too good to fling crap anymore. Poser.
June 27th, 2010 at 10:45 pm
Is it true that you volunteered to milk all the stallions after the races, Z? LMAO!!!!
June 27th, 2010 at 10:46 pm
you being an old farm boy an’ shit
June 28th, 2010 at 5:11 am
“milk all the stallions”
LMFAO!!! THAT was funny.
Herfs are fun and everything about that event sounds like a blast. Once JR opens it’s Phoenix location, that’ll rock!
June 28th, 2010 at 5:29 am
now that i have my own blog, i thought i would drop in to check out the competition….
not bad, zman, an you put a picture of a broad on… that made it better.
duckboy, the zman don’t jump as high from your jabs any more…
June 28th, 2010 at 7:34 am
Maduro, I hope your blog has a multitude of photos of hot broads or I will shred your ass into tiny little pieces.
Fair warning has been given…
June 28th, 2010 at 10:46 am
Maduroman was a blog? Where?
June 28th, 2010 at 10:47 am
‘was’ should be “HAS”
Maduroman HAS a blog? Where?
June 28th, 2010 at 7:23 pm
zman, as soon as i figure out how to do it i will…
brian, http://madmanwcp.wordpress.com/
June 29th, 2010 at 4:21 am
Man, I have got to make it out to one of these smoking events one day….
June 29th, 2010 at 7:26 am
It is such a fantastic time. Really.
June 30th, 2010 at 3:13 am
There’s no doubt that getting out with the boys is good for the male soul. Men just need events like this once in a while to recharge the inner ape. Would love to attend this one some day, but it’s a long haul from FL.
June 30th, 2010 at 4:52 am
I hear ya, Bubba!
June 30th, 2010 at 6:13 am
Would have been tough for me to attend, since I spent 6 glorious days in Belize, with a couple side trips to Guatemala, where the senoritas are pretty and easy. We also drank several bottles of booze, cases of local beer, ate tons of fresh prepared local food, and devoured a full box of Cuban Montecristo #2’s. We were totally whipped when we returned last night, but it was a trip to remember. And thank goodness I got upgraded to 1st class on the flight both ways. I went with a couple of buddies; no wives. What memories!
Hope all y’all had a good time while I was gone.
June 30th, 2010 at 11:46 pm
I am late to the party this week. Sounds like an awesome time, Z. Hey, is Nathan still doing the JR videos? Those were well done. I spent the better part of the week in Chicago, eating, drinking and watching the Cubs. What a great city. Back home now and the reality of work. Ugh. I need a ‘gar.